Some reflections......
I don't think we have to explain our children what terrorism is, it exists and children are seeing it be it live commentaries on TV, newspapers, emails etc. The only thing we can do as parents/educators/curriculum developers is not to hide terrorism and the ugliness that life offers. We generally present the good/ positive side of life undermining children's cognitive capacity. What we need is a balanced curriculum, sensitive teachers to handle this chaos. Speak to children, let them express their views, also show them the horrible side amongst all positives we show them. They understand everything and are witnessing everything.
I remember an year back when I was teaching at The Heritage school, Gurgaon, one of my student class three, had visited Wagha border (as told by his parents). He sat on his father's shoulder and peeped across in Pakistan and said,"Papa I see all men, women there are same, then why India and Pakistan fights?" This is a real incident told to me by the parents who had a very peaceful family and no violence. Children are reading and growing up in violence, we need to acknowledge that in texts too and help them integrate peace in their lifestyles. Meditation in schools has been replaced by drills on drum beats. There is dearth of activities that help children focus inwards. Moreover our curriculum developers want to stay clear of controversies while publishing and teachers do not take it up as they simply do not have time. The whole issue remains unaddressed and this creates inner conflict in children?
Where is PEACE? What is left is only VIOLENCE and CONSUMERISM. If we do not join hands today, tomorrow we shall see our own children with guns. Feel really disturbed due to all this chaos. To agree to violence, or submit to terrorism is again not PEACE. WE are equally guilty.......
Do not ask what to do, just think that what can I do and then what can WE do to change this scenario. Why all this mess around elections and the blame game? We accept violence in most forms. Terrorism and blasts are only the most visible, perverted forms of this chain. How many women have rebelled against male dominance be it their father, brother, husband in their family, how many of us have felt irritated with women being subjugated and portrayed as weaker sex in serials, how many of us have not felt happy when India won a match against Pakistan, how many of us have not dominated our maids, helpers etc. In workplaces, schools, homes, communities everywhere there is domination and the child is observing all this. What we need to only help the child is with to deal with these conflicts and focus inside. Introspect and love oneslf and then the environment. This will not come to the child if our very home is replica of a power- struck, authoritative society.
ELIMINATE violence in homes before one really needs to wonder about our kids.
2 comments:
Hi Meeta,
Your article talks about an important issue - need to talk to children and creating awareness at young age about the positive and negative aspects of things.But I would like to ask what if the child witnesses violence right at home in form of fight between parents or daughter-in law and mother-in-law? Children often are mute spectators. Unknowingly they may imbibe these habits.How can education help in tackling these issues? Can teachers help in anyway?
Sometimes parents fail to check the cartoons which are also full of violence like Hagemaru or Shinchan(the worst one, the child says all sorts of abusive things to his mother). It seems that violence has seeped into almost all the aspects of life. To what extent can parents control or restrict the programmes being watched by their children?
Hi Sucharita
You have raised an important issue: impact of domestic violence on the child's psyche? It is not wrong to assume that children in most families witness violence in form of fights, physical violence, verbal abuse, and sexual violence in some cases.If not in homes they may be subjected to one or the other on the roads, or by community members. Such a child can show many visible traits like can feel withdrawn, develop a submissive personality or can become violent, aggressive or attention seeking. There can be many other psychological effects of violence that might lead to personality disorders or may impact the child. What should a teacher do in this case. General observed scene is to blame the parents and label the child, resort to punishments and banish him/her from classrooms. Another role is to blmae on administration that may not provide a counsellor in school. Is it possible for a counsellor to handle all cases in school in light of huge numbers we have in INdia. Are all cases required to be dealt by a counslor? NO, a teacher has to understand her/his role as a counsellor, mentor. Through many ways one can figure out impact of violence in child. This can be through role plays, story telling, child's journals/ diaries, make belief play etc. It is important to know the child and observe him/her critically in various settings. TRy building a rapport with parents. BUt in most cases you shall find parents being defensive and not admitting violence at home, as it is embarassing. So ultimately it is you, an educator who has to commune with the child, talk to him/her, pay attention but not over attention and definitely space.
When children see violence at homes and in cartoons,you should not stop them. I am not saying encourage them to see all this, but let them also see the aftermaths of violence. Let them hear the news with you and think together of ways to combat violence. Stopping them will only accentuate a break between their personal world and outside world. Show them both violent and positive sides and question them. Challenge their thought, let them take decisions and help them adopt peaceful ways. That can only happen when a teacher models peace, if she is violent, rude, dominating, threatening then how can children understand peacful living.
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